I was hiking down the road one day
When I saw this great big farm
Right away I made up my mind
to move into the barn
There was corn growing in the fields
As far as my eyes could see
And a great big old 'Welcome' sign
I was sure that included me

I slept in the hen house over night
'Til the rooster called 'cock-a-doo'
I got up, rubbed my eyes and said,
'Well, good morning to you too'

He took one look and flew the coop
Left feathers flying thru the air
From that old bird, not a single word
They've looked for him everywhere

'It must have been a rat'
I heard the Farmer say
'I'll set a trap and catch that guy
Before the end of this day'

I went to the barn for breakfast
With the cows feeding there
I don't know if they've rounded them up
Those ladies ran everywhere

I'm wondering: What's wrong with me?
I can't make a friend out of this selection
Every time I speak a word
They run in the other direction

Now they call me a barn-yard rat
I'm a bully so they say
When the bull came by and I said 'Hi'
He even ran away

Tell me why they're afraid of me?
I've never hurt no one
I went to talk to the Farmer about this
and he met me with a gun
I guess I'm on the "Wanted' list
Got on that list someway
So I went to talk to the horse I saw
Standing there feeding on hay

I said 'Hi' as I walked by
He jumped all over the place
Then he took off out of the stall
Like he was running in a race

The Farmer seemed to be real mad
So he went and bought a cat
Sat him down in the middle of the yard
And said, 'Go find that rat'
I thought we'd play 'hide and seek'
and finally I'd have some fun
But Oh my no! I soon found out
He was worse than that loaded gun

I've maintained my cool so far
Haven't hurt nobody yet
But if that cat comes around again
Somebody will get hurt I bet

That bad boy's not afraid of nothing
And he sure took a disliking to me
So one day we'll have to slug it out
That old Tom Cat and me
I'm a second cousin to Might Mouse
'Tho they call me the Barn Yard Rat
I can scare crows right outta the corn
But I sure don't trust that cat

By noon I was pretty put out
by such an unfriendly bunch
So I strolled over to the pig pen
Just to have some lunch

I slipped up to the feeding trough
The sow let out a squeal
The last time I saw those piggies
They were running down the hill

I just want to be a friend
To that barn yard cowardly bunch
But I'll never be a friend to that cat
He wants to have me for lunch!

By Yolanda Cohen 2005

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